After the pub closed everyone went to Laras place.

Freddie is never quite sure what she is supposed to do at these things – she acts a little more wasted than she is until she actually is as wasted as she’s acting. They listen to George Thoroughgood and The Doors and ACDC and people stream in and out of the front door and the back door.

Cars drive up and drive by. Freddie rolls cigarettes and drinks beers. She stands on the veranda and she stands by the stereo. She dances a bit. She watches Aaron in the corner chatting up Debbie from the corner of one eye.  Amanda and Simon are talking down on the lawn. She thinks about walking down there and then walking up but it’s a steep slope and she’s now pretty out of it. 

Frank comes up and asks to lend some money for a couple of weeks and offers his Merc. They go smoke a joint but the living room window and she looks out at the Merc. She’s never driven one before. Its worth more than she’d be lending but if she had to sell it – would there be a buyer? She tells him she’ll want the papers but then changes her mind and asks for his Mazda. It’s straighter really and she’d be able to sell it faster if he gets busted or loses or whatever could go wrong with whatever he wants the money for. 

She is sharing a joint in the living room when she joins everyone else in looking out of the window. Simon and Amanda are arguing. Simon slaps Amanda and she puts her arms up and steps back from him. Simon steps toward her grabs her hair and slaps her again. Inside the stereo is still blasting but it seems quiet because nobody is shouting to each other anymore. Through the window you can’t hear what they are saying but she sees Amanda glance up – and Freddie feels dirty that she’s looking out at her friend.

Amanda is shaking her head and then Simon shakes Amanda. Its like a movie – not real. The next thing Simon is walking into the night and Amanda seems frozen until Freddie sees that Lara is there and she’s leading Amanda away – up to the house and the party. 

Later Freddie is in Lara’s bedroom – the party is still going out behind the door but she and some others are sitting here while Amanda cries. What Freddie really remembers Amanda saying that night is this: 

“But who will love me if I leave him?” 

Amanda is skinny and blonde with big blue eyes and a sweet honeyed voice. Who will love her? Well a lot of guys would like to try. But Amanda makes excuses for Simon. He had an angry father. And she knows about anger – her stepfather was like this. She knows she didn’t handle things right. She set him off. But, and she looks up and smiles at them, he can be so unbelievably sweet after he’s been angry. Freddie gives her a hug and tells her again she should leave and then she leaves the room before she says something really stupid. It’s the first time she’s understood that a person’s insides are not the same as their outsides. She wants to finish getting drunk and she wants to hurt Simon some way but she’s not sure how or how it would actually help.

A few days later and Freddie is at the beach pub at opening time. Hadn’t meant to be there but the Mazda has broken down and she knew there would be three free games on the table. Out of habit she gets a Waikato. 

The only other person in the bar is Tais brother Fen. He’s a big boy from the Black Power in Wellington. Not wearing his patch. She hasn’t spoken to him much – he has almost nothing to say. The story is that he had a few too many magic mushrooms and he’s a bit slower than he was. He has a jug of OJ in front of him. She sits at the table next to him and nods to the pool table. He picks up a queue and they start a slow game.

Simon comes in carrying a petrol can and looks around. Freddie and Fen are still sitting at separate tables. Simon doesn’t look at him when he asks her if he can siphon some gas from the Holden. Freddie wonders if he knows how disgusted she is in him and why he thinks she’d help. But then she has a better thought.

She tells him where the Mazda is and that the tank is half full and he leaves. Freddie and Fen are in luck and get their third free game because nobody else comes in for a while. Then Freddie asks to use the phone.

It goes to the Hamilton cop shop but she knows they’ll call a car. She tells them she saw a guy breaking in to a car up the gorge way.  She puts the phone down and sees Fen is right behind her. 

“Hey that’s that guy beat up his woman at Laras house the other night?”

“Yeah.”

“But you said he could take that petrol?”

‘Yeah.”

“Who’se car is that?”

“Not mine – a friend – he’s out of town.”

“He’s gonna spend the night in the cells then eh?”

‘Yeah – want another game? “ 

Freddie gets another beer. 

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Fen leaves around midafternoon and walks down to the beach and around the bay. Takes his time and pokes at the sand here and there.  

He wonders if he will